Yes, I know I’m driving you crazy – and I just don’t care

canstockphoto4701270To the guy in the car behind me:

Yes, I’m that @#&! idiot who’s hogging the middle lane and making you late for work.

And you know what? I couldn’t give a damn.

The left-hand lane is full of lorries who are restricted to 60 mph, and as they slow down to 40 every time we reach a hill, I’m not getting stuck behind them. If the road clears, I’ll pull in and let you pass, but until then you’ll just have to wait.

The right-hand lane is packed with maniacs zipping along at 90 miles an hour. If you want to overtake me, try pulling out in front of one of them. Please. You deserve each other.

Believe me, I know you want to get past. Yes, I did actually manage to figure that out when you flashed your headlights and tried to frighten me by driving close to my back bumper. Bad luck – I stopped being impressed by temper tantrums when I had kids!

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